- [Narrator] When we sit down to play a video game, we expect to be transported and engulfed into another world filled with action, wonder, and overall fun, but some companies make games that are so bad that they are borderline unplayable.
Releasing games like this is a total disrespect to all of our hard-earned cash, and a slap in the face to gamers across the globe. Today, we take a look at the top five worst games of all time. (dramatic fun music) Ride to Hell: Retribution 1% is an action-adventure game filled with bikers, brawls, and boobies https://pokiesnzonline.com/. Meet Jake Conway, a Vietnam vet that comes home to rejoin his biker gang lifestyle. His brother gets killed right in front of him, and so begins the epic journey for vengeance. Sounds badass, right? Well, not so much. Let's just list a few of the problems, shall we? It's riddled with thousands of quick time events, poor driving mechanics reminiscent to snowboarding on a ski slope rather than a motorcycle, idiotic fighting sequences, fully clothed sex scenes. They're so misogynistic that they happen seven seconds after saving a woman from sexual assault. The combination of motorbike and fence apparently equals an explosion. Some of the worst voice acting in any game ever. - Oh sooky, sooky, huhuh oh wow. - [Narrator] The soundtrack is so mind-numbingly repetitive. Cutscenes are just that, scenes that are cut so abruptly that you don't even know what's going on. On top of all the insanely bad gameplay and story, this game is the ultimate glitchfest. And to think that think that this game was released in 2013, after five years of cancellations, reboots, and redos, this was the end result? I would rather hock a loogie on dry pavement only to watch it bake in the hot sun on a Tuesday afternoon than to play this festering corpse of a game again. (yelling) Steel Battalion: Heavy Armor is the not-so-exciting follow-up to its predecessors Steel Battalion and Steel Battalion: Line of Contact. The first game features a controller that had lots of buttons to help you maneuver your mech, but it costs $200. So, instead of making people buy a crazy expensive peripheral, they thought it would be a good idea to utilize the technology of the Kinect on the Xbox 360. It was a game targeting the hardcore gamer looking to use the Kinect for something other than Kung-Fu High Impact. While the visuals and the story were decent at best, it fails miserably at the most fundamental necessity: motion controls that actually work. Trying to combine the standard Xbox 360 controller and the Kinect for gameplay was a terrible, terrible mistake. Heavy Armor has been widely panned by critics and gamers alike, and is considered unplayable due to the inability for the Kinect to accurately read the player's movements. If you've ever played this game, you've found yourself screaming, no, not that button. What are you doing? I'm not even moving my hands anymore. Flipping switches and pulling open vents required you to slow down and act as if you're miming it out to a child, and there's no guarantee that that would work either. Playing this game is like writing on a chalkboard wearing slippery oven mitts. Sure, you'll make some marks here and there, but trying to write your name is just frustrating and unbelievably difficult. What breaks my heart the most is that it's made by the beloved company Capcom. Yes, the same folks responsible for Street Fighter, Mega Man, Lost Planet, and Resident Evil. For shame. (dramatic music) Superman 64 is the bane of the DC Gaming enterprises. Yes, even worse than Aquaman. The very first stage is a barrage of rings that you have to fly through, but it's extremely difficult because the controls are horrendous. Once you manage to get through the rings, the on-screen instructions flash for a split second. You have to be a speed reader in order to comprehend what was just displayed. After you piece together what to do with those two cars from context clues, guess what? Another ring maze. There are a total of five ring mazes in the first stage alone. Second stage? Glitchtastic. You will fall through the floor or go through a wall. And after that? Oh yeah, more rings. You are inundated with ring flying for the entire game. It's basically a series of unimaginative mini games, and flying through rings.
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